Dear Mimie,He’s one of the lousiest Yoruba guy I ever met.

It was a Sunday afternoon, and I was on my way to church for a program that was to start by 4 p.m. when this car pulled over to ask for directions. I gave him answers, and he offered to drop me off since he could follow the same route to his destination. Initially, I told him not to bother; I’d pass. He insisted, and the daughter of Eve hopped in.

The introduction began, and he goes, “I’m Architect Segun”. His tone was prideful. He said he came into this town for a project and would be heading back to his location anytime soon. I’m like, ok. I guess he was expecting me to trip, being that he sold himself to me. Well, he had yet to get the memo. But on second thought, because of the nature of my job, I needed people—quality people at that. So I decided to play along and forced myself to act nice. Besides, I was looking like my sister Caro. He said I was the kind of woman he wanted to be with.

I got to my destination and alighted. Oga requests my contact. At first I declined, only for him to say he didn’t follow all the way down here and not get my number. As a matter of fact, he’s been trailing me. You could imagine the shock and mischievous smile on my face. I gave the number as I also had my own plans. Ha! target has to be met.

He called me after the program ended so he could drop me off at home. I told him I was fine. He became a pest. And for someone like me, I love my space, considering the fact that I had targets to meet and wasn’t down for anything that would waste my time and drain me further.

Monday was here, and he called like he was my boyfriend or husband-to-be. I told my work besties then, and they asked me to calm down. There was something shady about him.

Imagine someone who is loud and plays loud music with his windows down. Like anywhere he drives, people must turn. He offered to come pick me up from work since I wouldn’t have a drink with him. I didn’t reject that one, as I knew how difficult it was to get a bus back home. One of my work besties, with whom we stayed in the same area, followed. That was how Oga asked us to go for a drink, even though it was just for thirty minutes. Omo! I was drained from the day’s activities, but I still went. Na me want a free ride.

We arrived at a location I’ve never been to all my stay in this state. I was shocked, and he began making proper confessions. He’s been in this state for a long time. His office wasn’t really far from mine. It was less than 20 minutes drive. Segun used to take me on tours of places simply because he wanted me to get the best chicken. Guess what? I arrived home after 9 p.m.The only thing I didn’t do was swear for him.

I tried to establish friendship when he asked the nature of my job. I calmly explained everything to him, and he said he’d invest 5 million Naira; he would talk to his military friend; he was sure that one would invest 3 million Naira; and he kept mentioning names.

Awwwwn, this Yoruba demon didn’t want me to be stressed. But on second thought, when you have something, it will announce itself without stress. I was treading with caution.

On our second meeting, there was a problem at home with regard to light. My landlady did bypass with the prepaid meter, and PHNC did the needful. I was on the phone with my mom as she was explaining the events that played out to me when Oga said he’d give me a generator. He had a new one he wasn’t using. Please don’t ask me if he gave me (laughs so hard).

On our third meeting, he asked me to marry him. All he wants is to come back home and see food to eat. I ignored. He asked again, and I was wondering if he was talking to me. I told him no, as I barely knew him. He was exhibiting some traits I wasn’t comfortable with.

Before I’d say a word, he said, in an authoritative tone, that if I don’t give him the answer he wants, he will never ask me again. I asked if I looked desperate for marriage or if he thought that because I’m over 30 years old, I’d jump at his offer. I said a lot to him, and he felt disrespected. Take me home, I said. I guess no little one has ever challenged him.

To make this story shorter, guess what? He was asking one of my work besties out. Something happened at work, and she had to resign. He offered to help her get a job. The job never came to him. It was just promises upon promises. When she told me, I blocked him on WhatsApp. Since he knew she wasn’t going to date him, he resumed calling me. I kept ignoring his calls. He’d send me text messages. When I confronted him, he said my friend was lying. Even with the evidence of chats?

He kept calling me. I got fed up and decided to block him completely.

I forgot to add that, in the course of our conversation one day, he said he was going to pay them off and give them whatever they wanted so he could marry me. I can’t remember my parents putting me up for auction.

I noticed the disrespect was too much from him, not just to me but to the workers at the bar he frequents and to the security men. He would threaten that he would make sure they were fired simply because he knew the owners of the bars. I can’t be with someone who has no respect for people, regardless of their status in life. So, I had to minimize how I relate to him before he shot himself in the leg. The red flags were too much, and I had to completely cut myself off for my sanity. Until I stopped talking with him, he never invested. If he doesn’t say “I’ll pay in next week, it will be tomorrow “. We kept going back and forth. He bragged to the point of me telling him it wasn’t necessary. Haba!

If promise and failure were a name, it would be Segun.

If being loud without action had a name, it would be Segun.

Imagine an only son with such a disgusting attitude.

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